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>>>तपाई
वेभ साइट वनाउने
विचारमा हुनुहून्छ
या होस्टिङ्ग गर्ने
विचारमा हुनुहुन्छ
भने सस्तो
राम्रो भरपर्दो वेभ
होस्टिङ्
नेपाल >>>
Phone: 9851001068
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HIndi jokes? CLICK HERE
Friendship Jokes:
E tEst oF fRiEndsHip dOseN't
cOmeS wHen u R 2GethEr. It cOmEs wHeN u ParT waYs &
u ReaLizE tHat dEsPitE tHe dIsTanCe, thE fRiEndshIp iS sTilL
tHeRe...
?FRIENDS
True friends are like Diamonds... they are real and rare.
False friends are like leaves... they are scattered everywhere.
?F.U.C.K
REMEMBER: if u need a FUCK, u can always count on me bcoz
F.U.C.K stands for FRIENDS U CAN KEEP. Fuck 4ever, &
promise me that we FUCK till eternity!
?FRIENDSHIP IS....
FRIENDSHIP isn't how U forGet but how U forGive, Not how
U liSten but how U UnderStand, Not what U see but how U
feel, and not how U Let Go but how U hold oN!!!
? PRICELESS GIFT
FriEndSHiP iS A PRiCeLeSs GiFt tHaT cAn'T Be BoUgHt Or SoLd,
BuT To Have An UnDeRsTaNdiNg FriEnd iS FaR MoRe WoRtH tHaN
GoLd~!
?SUBSCRIBER CANNOT BE REACHED
If you need advice, text me... If you need a friend, call
me... If you need me, come to me... If you need money...
........... THE SUBSCRIBER CANNOT BE REACHED!
? COMPARE
FRIENDSHIP is like a tree... It is not MEASURED on how TALL
it could be, but is on how DEEP the ROOTS HAVE GROWN...
?FRIENDS 4 LIFE
Without humor, life sux. Without courage, life is hard.
Without love, life is hopeless. Without friends like you,
life is impossible!
?COMPUTER
A good friend is like a computer; me 'enter' ur life, 'save'
u in my heart, 'format' ur problems, 'shift' u 2 opportunities
& never 'delete' u from my memory!
?FRIENDS ALWAYS
In this WORLD, where everything seems UNCERTAIN, only one
thing is DEFINITE. You'll always be my FRIEND, beyond WORDS,
beyond TIME & beyond DISTANCE!
?ANGEL FRIENDS
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I believe in angels, the kind that heaven sends. I'm surrounded
by angels but I call them my best friends.
?OUT OF MY CONTROL
Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was choice, but
falling in love with you was completely out of my control.
? MEMORY LASTS FOREVER
A memory lasts forever, and never does it die. True friends
stay together and never say good bye.
? FRIENDSHIP
The ship that will never sink is my friendship with you.
? NEVER SPLIT
I met U as a stranger, I leave U as a friend, as long as
the world stands, our friendship nv ends. All friends nv
split N even if they do they will meet again.
?NEVER LOSE TRUE FRIENDS
I always thought loving some1 was the greatest feeling,
but I realised tat loving a friend is even better, we lose
ppl we love but we never lose true friends.
? WITHOUT A FRIEND LIKE U
EveRyDay I seE LoTs oF StRangErS PasSiNg By mE, ThiS mAkeS
mE reAlisED tHat, LifE woUlD be BORING, WiThoUt A FriEnD
LiKE U...
? BEHIND YOU
DuRiNg OuR FrIeNdShIp, ThErE wIlL B TiMeS U wOn't SeE Me
BeSiDe U, DuN ThInK I LeFt U BeHiNd, I JuSt ChOsE To WaLk
BeHiNd U So I CaN CaTcH U WhEn U Fall...
? NAKED
GUY: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. GAL: If I
see you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
? MAKING LOVE
After making love, wat r u tryin to say? I love u? Wrong!
1 more time? Wrong. U r so pretty?Wrong. I'm so tired? Wrong!
The answer is tissue...tissue...plsss!!!
?KISS
A peach is a peach, a plum is a plum. what is a kiss without
a tongue.
?PAINTING
A man was looking at a painting 4 a long time of a naked
woman with leaves covering the body, he was asked what he
was doing & he answered - waitng 4 autumn.
?FALLING APART
Its been a rough day. I got up this morning, put on a shirt
N a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase N the handle
came off. I'm afraid 2 go 2 the bathroom.
?HOME EARLY
1 day as I came home early from work, I saw a guy jogging
naked. I said to the guy, 'Hey buddy, why are you doing
that?' He said, 'Because you came home early.'
? NEVER LOSE ME!
We gain and lose things every day. But trust me on one thing:
YOU WILL NEVER LOSE ME! I will always be there as a friend!
?BEST FREN
A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches
your heart.
?SHOOTING STARS
The times we shared is like shooting star... the time is
short but really beautiful moments.... Forever engraved
in our hearts.... Friends forever~!!!
? KEEPING A FRIEND
KeEping a FRIEND is As Difficult AS losing one. U sacrifice
A lot To keep them. I may not have sacrificed enuf 4 u...
but in my HEART I swear I'm keeping U..
? PROMISE
We've known each other by CHANCE, became friends by CHOICE,
still friends by DECISION. And when we say FRIEND FOREVER,
that's definitely a lifetime PROMISE!
?FLOWER
If friends were flowers I would not pick you! I'll let you
grow in the garden & cultivate you with love and care
so I can keep you as a friend 4ever!!
? A RING
A ring is round and has no end.... and that's how long I'll
be your friend.
?WONDERFUL FRIEND
There is a gift that gold cannot buy, a blessing dats rare
& true, dats the gift of a wonderful friend like the
friend dat i have in u!
?WAT U SEE
Wat u see as truth wat u see as lies remember that true
friendship never dies although we may change & drift
apart, ill always value u deep within my heart!
? FATE 2B FRIENDS
A friend is never a coincidence in your life, they are meant
to enter your life to bring you joy and laughter. So, i
will treasure the friendship between us.
? WHAT YOU SAY
Everyone hears what you say... Friends listen to what you
say... Best friends listen to what you don't say...
? FRIENDSHIP MEANS...
I want u 2 know that our friendship means a lot 2 me. U
cry, I cry. U laugh.. I laugh. U jump out of d window..
I look down n then.. I laugh again.. hahaha
? ALWAYS THERE FOR YOU...
Friends are like stars. You can't always see them, But you
know they are always there for you...
? LEAVING FOOTPRINTS
Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only
true friends will leave footprints in your heart.
?AS LONG AS....
As long as we have memories, yesterday remains; as long
as we have hope, tomorrow awaits. As long as we have Friendship,
each day is never a waste.
? MY BRA
a gd friend is like a gd bra... hard to find, very comfortable,
supportive, and always close to the heart..... HELLO MY
GD BRA :)
? PRICETAGS
GOD is so wise that he never created FRIENDS with pricetags,
Because..... if He did, I can't afford a precious FRIEND
like YOU!!!
?OLD FRIENDS
Never abandon old friends. They are hard 2 replace. Friendships
is like wine: it gets BETTER as it grows OLDER. Just like
us... i get BETTER, u get OLDER.
? PATH OF FRIENDSHIP
The sun is glazing, upon the sunlight i see the path of
our friendship shining brightly knowing that it is so great
to have a friend like YOU! :)
? NIGHT PRAYER
Dear God, thank you for making me healthy. Can you also
make me sexy? If you can't make me sexy, please make all
my friends fat. Amen.
?ABOUT ME
Handsome, Sweet, Intelligent, Spontaneous, Good Looking,
Nice Friends, Charming, Funny, well... Enough about ME!
How about you?
? GOOD TASTE
A phone is a form of communication, a kiss is a form of
affection. A picture is a form of remembrance, CHOOSING
me as ur FRIEND is a form of.. ehem GOOD TASTE!
? BE MY FRIEND
If U need a friend and there are a hundred steps between
us, you can take the 1st step to get near me and i will
take all 99 step to be there for you.
? RULES TO BE HAPPY
6 rules to be HAPPY: Free your heart from hatred; Free your
mind from worries; Live simply; Expect less; Give more &
Always have ME as UR FRIEND
? FRIENDS
Time might lead me to nowhere; Fate might break me apart;
I'll always be thankful that once, along my life's journey
I found a friend like U...
?KISS MY ASS
The fluffy clouds may kiss the sky, The rose may kiss the
butterfly, The morning dew may kiss the grass,But u my friend
can kiss my ass!
?RING
I wish I were a ring Upon my girlfriend's hand, 'Cause everytime
she'd wipe her rear I'd see the promised land....
? FRIENDS LIKE HAIR
Friends are like a head of hair. You might lose some, but
with enough $money$ you can buy them back.
?NICE FRIENDS
A day is going to end again. It is nice to have a friend
like U making my everyday seems so great. Thank U my good
friend lastly gd nite n sweet dreams...
I'm @ the police station now been done 4 drink driving.Urine
sample was positive so I nicked the sample.they r now doin
me 4 taking the piss
?im at the police station.The police caught
me & filed a case against me "possession of good
looks".i'm doomed! i need someone ugly 2 bail me out-so
hurry up!
?i hereby place u under arrest 4 violating
code 0569 - distracting public with ur xtreme good looks
&sex appeal.remain silent & report 2 my bedroom
Sexy Jokes
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?Girl: Im like a radio,my mouth spkr,my
left breast
tuner, right 1 volume. Man:Can I try?(touches d
breats)-no sound. Girl:U havent plugged in yet!
?Nipple Nipple dont be far, can I press
u in my car. Up
above the chest so high, always milky never dry. Let
me suck you, dont feel shy.
?Man says to his wife: Let me take a picture
of your
breasts, than I can always look at them. Wife: Let me
take a picture of you penis, I will have it enlarged
?The sky is blue,grass is green,harder the fuck the
louder the scream,louder the scream the better the
fuck,give me a ring u might be in luck
?Q:Who is stronger, Man Or Woman? A:A woman
bcos she
lifts 2 mountains on her chest while a man lifts 2
stones with the help of a crane.
?A husband was asked: Do u talk to your
wife after sex?
His answer: Depends, if I can find a phone.
?Son on his honeymoon phoned his mom asking
what 2 do.
MOM:Put ur biggest thng on her hairiest thng. SON:got
my nose in her armpit. Now what?
?rooster&cat goin over bridge,cat slips&falls
in
river.rooster cant stop laughin.wats D moral?whereva
therZ a wet pussy therZ a happy cock
?LUV D WAY IT RUBS AGAINST D SOFT PINK FLESH
N MAKES A
CREAMY FOAMY LIQUID AS IT THRUSTS IN&OUT,UP&DOWN,CAN`T
WAIT 4 NEXT TIME.LUV MY TOOTHBRUSH
FUNNY JOKES:
>>>तपाई वेभ
साइट वनाउने
विचारमा हुनुहून्छ
या होस्टिङ्ग गर्ने
विचारमा हुनुहुन्छ
भने सस्तो
राम्रो भरपर्दो वेभ
होस्टिङ्
नेपाल >>>
Phone: 9851001068
We will now upgrade your brain, please wait....Searching....searching...still
searching....sorry,NO BRAIN found...!
?I'M AN ALIEN. I HAVE JUST TRANSFORMED MYSELF
INTO THIS TEST. AS YOU ARE READING I'M HAVING SEX WITH YOUR
EYEBALLS. I KNOW THAT YOU LIKE IT BECAUSE YOU ARE SMILING
?All the love that history knows is said
to be in every rose!Yet all the love that could be found
in two, is less than what I feel for you.
?If you think there is good in everybody,
you haven't met everybody.
?When a man talks dirty to a woman, it's
sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's
$3.95 per minute.
?Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
?Born Free. . . . .Taxed to Death.
?Conserve toilet paper, use both sides.
?I get enough exercise just pushing my luck!
?Sorry, I don't date outside my species.
?Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness
pays off NOW!
?First the engagement ring, then the wedding
ring, then the suffering.
?Always remember you're unique, just like
everyone else.
?Dad, what vagina looks like? Before sex:
a pink rose with soft lovely pelats and perfum aroma. And
after sex? boy, have you ever seen a bulldog eating mayonnaise!
?Kiss my ass, and do it fast,suck my dick
and do it quick.
?Bad sex is better then a good day in school.
?Never let a man's mind wander, it's too
little to be out on it's own!!!!
?Sex is like programing; One mistake, and
YOU WILL HAVE TO SUPPORT IT FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE…
?Their are moments in life when you really
miss someone. And you wish you could just pluck them from
your dreams......
?My girl and me, we are so perfect, she
loves me, and I love myself too...
?Hi, do you want to have my children? No.??
...Okay, then can we just practice?
?I took an IQ test and the results were
negative.
?Jesus loves you... everyone else thinks
your an asshole…
?If you wanna be a hipi, put you flower
in your pipi…
?Don`t drink water, because fish fuck in
it!
?Hi! Please stand by while this program
enlarges your penis...........................ERROR: Your
penis was not found! Sorry..............
?Never let a man's mind wander, it's too
little to be out on it's own!!!!
?It is good for girl to meet boy in park,
but better for boy to park meat in girl.
?News: 3 Chimps escaped from the zoo...
1 was caught watching tv... another playing football and
the third one was caught reading this txt message
?God made man and then rested. God made
women and then no one rested
?The longest sentence known to man: "I
do."
?CNN News. Bush orders 15,000 FBI trained
dogs to track down Osama. FBI awaiting further orders as
one of the dogs is reading this
?Crime doesn't pay...Does that mean my job
is a crime?
?This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way
dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for
dog, 20 dog, seconds dog! ... Now read without the word
dog.
?Why were males created before females?
Cos you always need a rough draft before the final copy.
?I want to suck you... lick you... wanna
move my tongue all over you...wanna feel you in my mouth...yep,
tat's how u...eat an ice cream!
?ALGEBRA: A weapon of math destruction.
?Don't spend $2 to dry-clean a shirt. Donate
it to the Salvation Army instead. They'll clean it, put
it on a hanger. Next morn buy it back for 50p.
?Do you ever notice that when you're driving,
anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving
faster than you is a maniac?
?Q:What is the difference between a wife
and a girlfriend?
A:About 45 pounds!!
?Q: What is the difference between a smart
blonde and a UFO?
A: There have been sightings of UFOs.
?I think drinking and driving is terrible.
You always spill it when you change gears...
?There was this Eskimo chick who spent the
night with her boyfriend. Next morning she found out she
was 6 months pregnant.
?What did the elephant say to the naked
man?
How do you breathe through that thing?
?What happened when the Pope went to Mount
Olive?
Popeye beat the crap outta him.
?I've used up all my sick days, so I'm calling
in dead.
?A 3-legged dog walks into a saloon in the
Old West. He slides up to the bar and says:
"I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."
?Boss: (to employee) - Experts say humor
on the job relieves tension in this time of down-sizing,
Knock, Knock.
Employee: Who's there?
Boss: Not you anymore.
?What's the diff between a Rottwieler and
a Poodle?
If Rotty starts humping your leg, let it finish.
?Aim for the stars. But first, aim for their
bodyguards.
?Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to
the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
?What is the difference between a woman
and a magnet?
Magnets have a positive side!
?The probability of someone watching you
is proportional to the stupidity of your action.
?Q: What does a blonde owl say?
A: What, what?
?WOMAN: The most efficient money reducing
agent known to man-kind!
?What do you call a blonde hiding in a closet?
The 1977 World Hide and Seek Champion.
?Why was Phillip's girlfriend annoyed?
Coz she found out that Phillips 24 inch was a TV.
?Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?
He was looking for Pooh!
?What do you say to a woman with 2 black
eyes?
You don't, you've told her twice already!
?What's the difference between Margaret
Thatcher and Edwina Currie?
One screwd the miners, the other screwed Majors
?Q: What happens when a blonde gets Alzheimers
disease?
A: Her IQ goes up.
?Jesus saves, he shoots, HE SCORES!!
?Any woman that thinks the way to a mans
heart is through his stomach is aiming just a little too
high.
?I'm late for work because the train driver
had an out of body experience and didn't come back for a
day and a half.
?I like Kids. But I don't think I could
eat a whole one.
?How many men do you need for a mafia funeral?
Only one. To slam the car boot shut.
?For sale : Twin beds, one hardly used.
?What do you call a Lada/Skoda at the top
of a hill? A miracle.
?Whats the definitoin of suspicion? A nun
doing pressups in a cucumber field.
?Why doesn't Jesus eat M and M's? Cos they
fall through his hands.
?Whits pink, wrinkled and hangs oot yer
trousers??? Yer Gran!
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jokes?
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?What are 3 words you never wanna hear whilst
making love? Honey, I'm home!
?What do you get when you cross ESP with
PMS? A bitch who knows everything.
?How do you save a man from drowning? Take
yer foot of his head.
?Q: How many men does it take to change
a toilet roll?
A: We don't know. Never happens.
?Q: Why was the leper caught speeding?
A: He couldn't take his foot of the accelerator.
?Q: What do you get when you cross a computer
with a whore?
A: An f****ing know it all.
? A chicken sandwidch walked into the bar,
ordered some food and beer. The bartender says: "Sorry,
we don't serve food here".
A: Because people keep hitting them with
dictionaries.
? Why do farts smell? For benefit of the
deaf.
? I've got the ship, you've got the harbor
... what say we tie up for the night?
?If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd
put U and I together.
? Why'd the couple stop after 3 children?
Cos they heard every fourth child born is chinese.
? What did the drummer get on his IQ test?
Drool...
?I can please only one person per day. Today
is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either.
? It's no accident that stressed spelled
backwards is desserts.
? I wonder if you choke a smurf, what color
does it turn?
? Just because you're paranoid, it doesn't
mean they're NOT out to get you.
? You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding
through peanut butter.
? I'd explain it to you, but your brain
would explode.
? My Reality Check bounced.
? Minds are like Parachutes. They work best
when open.
? Do not meddle in the affairs of cats,
for they are subtle and will whiz on your computer.
? Lightyears ahead! Just a phonecall away!
?Very funny Scotty. Now beam up my clothes.
?Do chickens think rubber humans are funny?
?There cannot be a crisis today; my schedule
is already full.
?Borrow money from pessimists--they don't
expect it back
?As a computer, I find your faith in technology
amusing
?Nothing in the known universe travels faster
than a bad check.
?What do you call a handcuffed man?
- Trustworthy.
?What's the quietest place in the world?
The complaint department at the parachute packing plant
?Q: What do you do when a blonde throws
a pin at you?
?A: Run like hell....she's got a hand grenade
in her mouth.
?Why don't men often show their true feelings?
- Because they don't have any. 1
?What's the difference between a man and
E.T.?
- E.T. phoned home.
?What is the thinnest book in the world?
What Men Know About Women.
?A successful man is one who makes more
money than his wife can spend.
?Marriage is a three ring circus: an engagement
ring, a wedding ring, and suffering
?How Dogs and Women are alike.....
Neither believe that silence is golden.
Neither can balance a checkbook.
Both put too much value on kissing.
?Marriage is the process of finding out
what kind of man your wife would have preferred.
?If you jogged backward ... would you gain
weight?
?Did you hear about the new Chinese Cookbook
being sold only at pet stores?
"101 Ways to Wok Your Dog"
?If you can't change your mind, are you
sure you still have one?
?Did you ever walk into a room and and forget
why you walked in? that's how dogs spend their lives.
?I'm not into working out. My philosophy:
No pain. No pain.
?I only use de-oudourant under one arm,
so I know what I would have smelled of.
?Did you hear about the idiot who walked
around the world? He drowned.
?A woman walked into a fancy cocktail bar
and asked the barman for a "double entendre" -
so he gave her one!
?Four fonts walk into a bar. The barman
says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"
?A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into
a bar. The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
?A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman
says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"
?A dyslexic man walks into a bra
?A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac
under his arm and says: "Pint please, and one for the
road."
?A three-legged dog walks into a saloon
in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and announces:
"I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."
?Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused
his dentist's Novocain during root canal work? He wanted
to transcend dental medication.
?I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes
last week, phoned her up to arrange a date but unfortunately
she'd popped her clogs.
?Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly;
but when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving
once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat
it.
?News: 3 Chimps escaped from the zoo...
1 was caught watching tv.. another playing football and
the third one was caught reading this txt message
?God made man and then rested. God made
women and then no one rested
?The longest sentence known to man: "I
do."
?CNN News. Bush orders 15,000 FBI trained
dogs to track down Osama. FBI awaiting further orders as
one of the dogs is reading this
?Crime doesn't pay...Does that mean my job
is a crime?
?This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way
dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for
dog, 20 dog, seconds dog! ... Now read without the word
dog.
?Why were males created before females?
Cos you always need a rough draft before the final copy.
?I want to suck you.. lick you.. wanna move
my tongue all over you...wanna feel you in my mouth...yep,
tat's how u...eat an ice cream!
?ALGEBRA: A weapon of math destruction.
?Don't spend £2 to dry-clean a shirt.
Donate it to the Salvation Army instead. They'll clean it,
put it on a hanger. Next morn buy it back for 50p.
?Do you ever notice that when you're driving,
anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving
faster than you is a maniac?
?Q:What is the difference between a wife
and a girlfriend?
A:About 45 pounds!!
?Q: What is the difference between a smart
blonde and a UFO?
A: There have been sightings of UFOs.
?I think drinking and driving is terrible.
You always spill it when you change gears...
?There was this Eskimo chick who spent the
night with her boyfriend. Next morning she found out she
was 6 months pregnant.
?What did the elephant say to the naked
man?
How do you breathe through that thing?
?What happened when the Pope went to Mount
Olive?
Popeye beat the crap outta him.
?I've used up all my sick days, so I'm calling
in dead.
?A 3-legged dog walks into a saloon in the
Old West. He slides up to the bar and says:
"I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."
?Boss: (to employee) - Experts say humor
on the job relieves tension in this time of down-sizing,
Knock, Knock.
Employee: Who's there?
Boss: Not you anymore.
?What's the diff between a Rottwieler and
a Poodle?
If Rotty starts humping your leg, let it finish.
?Aim for the stars. But first, aim for their
bodyguards.
?Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to
the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
?What is the difference between a woman
and a magnet?
Magnets have a positive side!
?The probability of someone watching you
is proportional to the stupidity of your action.
?Q: What does a blonde owl say?
A: What, what?
?WOMAN: The most efficient money reducing
agent known to man-kind!
?What do you call a blonde hiding in a closet?
The 1977 World Hide and Seek Champion.
?Why was Phillip's girlfriend annoyed?
Coz she found out that Phillips 24 inch was a TV.
?What do Germans use for birth control?
Their personalities!
?Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?
He was looking for Pooh!
?What do you say to a woman with 2 black
eyes?
You don't, you've told her twice already!
?What's the difference between Margaret
Thatcher and Edwina Currie?
One fucked the miners, the other fucked the Majors
?Q: What happens when a blonde gets Alzheimer's
disease?
A: Her IQ goes up.
?Jesus saves, he shoots, HE SCORES!!
?Any woman that thinks the way to a mans
heart is through his stomach is aiming just a little too
high.
?I'm late for work because the train driver
had an out of body experience and didn't come back for a
day and a half.
?What do you get if you cross an Irishman
with a German?
A man who's too drunk to follow orders.
?I like Kids. But I don't think I could
eat a whole one.
?How many men do you need for a mafia funeral?
Only one. To slam the car boot shut.
?For sale : Air Bags, Used once.
?What do you call a Lada/Skoda at the top
of a hill? A miracle.
?What's the definition of suspicion? A nun
doing pressups in a cucumber field.
?Why doesn't Jesus eat M and M's? Cos they
fall through his hands.
?What's pink, wrinkled and hangs oot yer
trousers??? Yer Gran!
?What are 3 words you never wanna hear whilst
making love? Honey, I'm home!
What do you get when you cross ESP with
PMS? A bitch who knows everything.
?How do you save a man from drowning? Take
yer foot of his head.
?Q: How many men does it take to change
a toilet roll?
A: We don't know. Never happens.
Want to download more Nepali and HIndi
jokes?
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?Q: Why was the leper caught speeding?
A: He couldn't take his foot of the accelerator.
?Q: What do you get when you cross a computer
with a whore?
A: An fucking know it all.
?A chicken sandwich walked into the bar,
ordered some food and beer. The bartender says: "Sorry,
we don't serve food here".
?Because people keep hitting them with dictionaries.
?Why do farts smell? For benefit of the
deaf.
?I've got the ship, you've got the harbor
... what say we tie up for the night?
?If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd
put U and I together.
?Why'd the couple stop after 3 children?
Cos they heard every fourth child born is chinese.
?What did the drummer get on his IQ test?
Drool...
?Q: How did the Pollack burn his face?
A: Bobbing for french fries.
?Q: What's difference between Yogurt and
Australia?
A: One has a real live culture.
?Q: What's diff between Michael Jackson
and grocery bag?
A: Ones white, made outta plastic and dangerous for kids
to play with. The other you carry groceries in.
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Fanny.
Fanny who?
Fanny the way you keep saying 'Who's there? Every time I
knock.
?Knock! Knock!
Who's There?
A midget who cant reach the doorbell.
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Harry.
Harry who?
Harry up and let me in!
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Harry, Butch, and Jimmy.
Harry, Butch and Jimmy who?
Harry up, Butch your arms around me, and Jimmy a kiss.
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive across the road.
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Mummy.
Mummy who?
Mummeasles are better so can I come in?
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Boo.
Boo who?
There's no need to cry, it's only a joke.
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Madam.
Madam who?
Madam key broke in the lock.
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I called by?
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Atch.
Atch who?
Bless you.
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Mister.
Mister who?
Mister last bus home.
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Ivor.
Ivor who?
Ivor sore hand from knocking so much.
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
York.
York who?
York coming over to my place tonight?
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Isabel.
Isabel who?
Isabel broken? I had to knock.
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in, it's cold out here.
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Grandma. Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Grandma. Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Grandma. Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Aunt.
Aunt who?
Aunt you glad Grandma's gone?
?Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Doris.
Doris who?
Doris locked - that's why I knocked.
?friendship is like peeing in your pants.
every1 can c it but only u can feel its true warmth.thank
u 4 being the pee in my pants xxxx
?(_!_)An arse (__!__)Fat arse (!)Tight arse
(_?_)Dumb arse (_*_)Sore arse (_zzz_)Tired arse (_E=mc2_)Smart
arse (_x_)Kiss my arse!!
?He met a lady while browsing. She unzipped
his dotcom when downloading. Since he was virus free he
slotted his floppydisk into her hotmail she screamed yahoo!
?Today its cool to have small cars and small
computers.Soon it will be cool to have a small penis too.then
you my friend will be THE MAN!!
?Viagra now available in eye drops, you
don't get an erection but you look hard!
?T-MOBILE regrets 2 inform u that the network
has gone down on everyone except u.We regret 2 inform u
that no one would go down on u.not even a network
?I only have SEX on days that begin with
T: Thanksgiving. Tuesday. Thursday. Today. Tomorrow. Thaturday.
thunday.. Tevery day
Clinton Jokes
>>>तपाई
वेभ साइट वनाउने
विचारमा हुनुहून्छ
या होस्टिङ्ग गर्ने
विचारमा हुनुहुन्छ
भने सस्तो
राम्रो भरपर्दो वेभ
होस्टिङ्
नेपाल >>>
Phone: 9851001068
Q : What was yesterday's Washington Post Headline?
A : Bush Beats Clinton
?Q : Why was Monica Lewinsky transferred from the White
House to the Pentagon?
A : She was traded for two brunettes and a redhead to be
named later.
?"One thing's for sure about Clinton...
He sure doesn't neglect domestic affairs!"
?Q : Why does Clinton wish he was like Ted Kennedy?
A : Cause Kennedy has an ex-wife and a dead girlfriend
?Q : How does Bill keep Monica Lewinsky away from the White
House?
A : He keeps offering to send Ted Kennedy over to give her
a ride
?Q : What did Clinton say to Gore about the whole affair?
A : Pardon me
?News item: Mike McCurry, the President s Press Secretary,
has just resigned. He could no longer keep a straight face
>>>तपाई
वेभ साइट वनाउने
विचारमा हुनुहून्छ
या होस्टिङ्ग गर्ने
विचारमा हुनुहुन्छ
भने सस्तो
राम्रो भरपर्दो वेभ
होस्टिङ्
नेपाल >>>
Phone: 9851001068
Cool Jokes
MATCHES
MuM: Have you brought the matches home? Son: Yes! Mum: Are
they working??? Son: Yes! I have try up all the fire macthes...
It's working.
?KNOWING YOURSELF
Make yourself a better person and know who you are before
you try and know someone else and expect them to know you.
? WHO YOU TRUST
There's always going to be people that hurt you so what
you have to do is keep on trusting and just be more careful
about who you trust next time around.
?GRATEFUL
Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting
the right one, so that when we finally meet the person,
we will know how to be grateful.
? WASTING YOUR TIME
Don't waste your time on a man/woman, who isn't willing
to waste their time on you.
?THE WORLD
To the world you may be one person, but to one person you
may be the world
?FIRST SIGHT
FiRsT NiTe, FiRsT SiGhT, I SaW, I KnEw, LoVe's SwEEtEr ThAn
MoUnTaiN DeW, A pRoMiSe I mAdE and' WiLL kEEp, 2 LoVe YOU
aLwAys~
? VALUE OF LOVE
LovE is Not HoW LonG U've BeeN 2gEthEr; nOt HoW MucH U've
GIvEn oR RecEivE; Not hOw MaNy TimEs U've HeLpEd EaCh OthEr
--- Its HoW U VALUE EaCh OtHEr...
? STILL LOVING U
i håtê Smî|îÑg jûSt
tO prEtêñD î'M ñOt hUrt. î
hÅtE to gîGglê tO Show î'll ßê
okåY. î hAtE tO laUgh aFtEr î Cry. í
Stìll lovE YOU ßût í'Vé
tó SaY gooDbYê...
? NEWSPAPER
Some newspapers publish untrue news, but there is one thing
that is true. What is it? >>> Date <<<
? NEVER REGRET WHAT YOU DO
Don't regret what you've did, but regret what you never
did, go and say 'I LOVE U' to your loved one!
? YOUR FUTURE
The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten
past, you can't get on well in life until you let go of
past failures and heartaches.
? UNTIL IT'S GONE
It's true that we don't know what we've got until it's gone,
but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing
until it arrives.
? NEEDS
Every girl wants one guy to meet all her needs, while every
guy wants all the girls to meet his one need.
? HUGGING YOU
Last night I hugged my pillow and dreamt of you... I wish
that someday I'd dream about my pillow and I'd be hugging
you.
? CHARACTER VS REPUTAION
Want to download more Nepali and HIndi
jokes?
CLICK HERE
Be MorE Concerned AbouT YouR CharacteR ThaN YouR ReputationN
BecausE YouR CharacteR Is WhO YoU ArE AnD YoU ReputaioN
Is WhaT OtherS ThinK Of YoU!!!
? 1 HEARTBEAT
When I look at you, my heart skips 1 beat but later that
beat could mean a lifetime of tears wasted on some thing
i knew i could never have!
? GIRLS ARE LIKE...
Girls are like phones, we like to be held and talked too,
but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!
? LOVE IS SO CONFUSING
Love makes life so confusing but without love would you
want to live?
? IT'S OVER
Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happend.
? IDIOT
It's better to let someone think you are an Idiot than to
open your mouth and prove it.
? REALITY
Love Is When You Don't Want To Go To Sleep, Because Reality
Is Better Than A Dream.
? FORGET ME NOT
Under the sea, there lays a rock. In the rock, there is
an envelope. In the envelope, there is a paper. On the paper,
there are 3 words... 'Forget me not'
? LIVE YOUR LIFE
When u were born, u were crying and everyone round u was
smiling.. Live ur life so that when u die, u're the one
who is smiling and everyone round u is crying..
? MAKE THE BEST OF IT
The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of
everyting... they just make the most of everything that
comes along their way...
? LIFETIME GUARANTEE
I got nothing else 2 offer, so 2 U, it's luv I going 2 send.
It's nothing tat I borrowed, it's nothing I’d lend. This
luv I’m sending has a Lifetime Guarantee!
? COMPUTER
A good friend is like a computer; me 'enter' ur life, 'save'
u in my heart, 'format' ur problems, 'shift' u 2 opportunities
& never 'delete' u from my memory!
? TEARS
Don't cry for someone who don't worth while; the one who
is worth, wouldn't make one cries..
? SEAT BELT
A Short thing, It gets Longer when U hold it, N pass between
women Breasts, N enters into A hole What is it? 1 min 2
think! Car Seat Belt, U dirty mind.
? DESSERTS
When you are feeling stressed and about to breakdown, just
remember: STRESSED is just DESSERTS spelled backwards..
it's a piece of cake!
? MEMORIES
Memories is treasured, no one can steal. Parting is heartache,
no one can heal. Some'll forget you when you are gone, but
I'll remember you no matter how long.
? DON'T BE SAD
If someone comes into your life and becomes part of you,
but for some reason he/she could not stay, don't be too
sad... be glad that your paths have crossed.
? SHINING STAR
You're like a shining star in the cold dark nite, you lead
me, you guide me, you makes everything seems so rite...
? SHE..
She BlinDeD mE wiTh hEr LigHT, it'S SucH A beaUtiFuL SigHt...
The WaY She MoVes Is LiKe An AngEl... ShE gOt Me WaLkiNg
On Air.
? I FELL FOR YOU
Excuse me, do u have a Band-Aid? I skinned my knee when
I fell for you
? RUNNING
aRe Ur LeGs TiReD? CoZ yoU'Ve BeEn RuNNiNg ThRoUgH My MiNd
aLL DaY LoNg!
? 911
Why can't a blonde dial 911? Because She can't find the
eleven!!!
? FRIENDS ALWAYS
In this WORLD, where everything seems UNCERTAIN, only one
thing is DEFINITE. You'll always be my FRIEND, beyond WORDS,
beyond TIME & beyond DISTANCE!
? WHY IS HE NOT MINE...
wOrLd iS cRueL, LoVe iS bLinD. LoSt iN sAdnEsS, BluR In
miND. HeArT iS bRoKeN, fLaMe hAd DiEd. TiMe HaS pAsSeD bUt
wHy iS hE... sTiLL nOt mInE...
? DON'T WANT TO LOST YOU
If yöü cän bé ävöìdéd
sìmply by clösìng r éyés,
I wöüldn't blìnk ät äll for I
dönt wänt to lét ä sécönd
päss hävìng löst ä höñey
lìké YÖü!
? CAN'T LET U GO
Höld ä trüé frìénd wìth
böth yöür händs, doñt lét
gö 4 trüé frìend cömés
öncé ìn ä lìfétìmé.
Thåt's why ì'm höldìng yoü
tight! Cänt lét Ü go
? NOT TOO YOUNG
No one is too young for love, because love doesn't come
from your mind, which knows your age, but from your heart,
which knows no age.
? ANGEL FRIENDS
I believe in angels, the kind that heaven sends. I'm surrounded
by angels but I call them my best friends.
? I FOUND U
Love is like a cloud... love is like a dream... love is
1 word and everything in between... love is a fairytale
come true... Coz I found love when I found U.
? NEVER END
If I had a single flower for every time I thought of you
I could walk in my garden forever, never finding the end.
? IT HURTS
It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, but
what hurts more is to love someone, and never find the courage
to let them know how you feel.
? SMILE
You do not know the effect you have on me because every
time I see you my heart begins to smile.
? FORGET YOU
It takes a minute to have a crush, an hour to like someone,
and a day to love someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget
someone.
? IT NEVER SEEMS TO LAST
I'm scared to fall in love, scared to fall fast, because
every time I fall in love... it never seems to last.
? MY HEART BREAKS
I could fill a 1000 pages telling U how I feel, and still
U would not understand.. So now I leave w/o a sound, except
my heart shattering as it hits the ground.
? A MILLION
A million words would not bring you back, I know, because
I've tried. Neither would a million tears. I know, because
I've cried.
? SWEETEST THING
Once Upon a Time, Something happened to me. It was the sweetest
thing that ever could be. It was a fantasy, a dream come
true it was the day I met you.
? FALL IN LOVE
People say you only fall in love once, but when I hear your
voice I fall in love all over again.
? CRYING FOR
I cry 4 the times U were almost mine. I cry 4 the memories
I've left behind. I cry 4 the pain, the lost, the old, the
new. I cry 4 the times I thought I had U.
? CRAZY FOR YOU
I'm crazy for you. Touch me once and you'll know it's true,
I never wanted anyone like this, it's all brand new, you'll
feel it in my kiss, I'm crazy for you.
? NOT TO FADE
Looking back on all these years, all the smiles and all
the tears, I never want these memories to fade.
? YOU ARE THE ONE
You asked me who I liked and I said no one... but what I
really meant was no one but you.
? SLEEP FOREVER
If the only possible way we can be together is in my dreams,
then I'll sleep forever.
? LOVE IS TO THINK
Love is to think about someone else more times in a day
than you think about yourself.
? IN LOVE WITH YOU
There are times when I fall in love with someone new, but
I always seem to find myself back in love with you.
? SOMEONE ELSE
The hardest thing you'll ever do is watch the one u love,
love someone else.
? MASTERPIECE
God created men first, coz you always make a rough draft
before a masterpiece.
? OUT OF MY CONTROL
Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was choice, but
falling in love with you was completely out of my control.
? MEMORY LASTS FOREVER
A memory lasts forever, and never does it die. True friends
stay together and never say good bye.
? HEART TO CIRCLE
Always draw a circle around the ones you love, never draw
a heart because hearts can be broken, but circles are never
ending.
>>>तपाई
वेभ साइट वनाउने
विचारमा हुनुहून्छ
या होस्टिङ्ग गर्ने
विचारमा हुनुहुन्छ
भने सस्तो
राम्रो भरपर्दो वेभ
होस्टिङ्
नेपाल >>>
Phone: 9851001068
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